Thursday, September 17, 2009

Blog Content

When you have a blog, it is basically an expression of free speech. A mind journal if you will, to share over the world wide web. The title of the blog, determines the content. The title would help people looking for Alzheimer's Caregiver Support, if they find the actual blog.
I have no daily AD journal to share with readers, many caregivers are struggling with the day to day existence, caring for a mother or father, or grandparent or spouse.
Many blogs are to help raise awareness and get the word out, to advertise an Alzheimer's walk. Some are more scientifically and research oriented. Some are written by people who are themselves diagnosed with and dealing with the disease in themselves.
My mother died from AD 22 years ago. Why write a blog now? What does Minnesota provider tax and lighthouses have to do with AD?
Is this therapeutic for me to write this blog 22 years after my mother's death? Is this blog spreading any valuable information about the disease?
Just about every aspect of my life has been shaped and affected by my mother. Her AD robbed her of herself and her personality. It was a part of my childhood and adolescent process and my experience with my mother.
I went from being a caregiver to her to becoming a doctor. That's how I got my start with empathy and comparison and perhaps most commonly overlooked: that sense of responsibility for others.
Any AD caregiver knows that 'you are it' , the buck stops with you, you are in charge and it is your responsibility. It is a lot of responsibility. There are sometimes feelings like:
"I should have done this," "I could have done this", "What if?" "I'm not trying hard enough." "Why is this so hard?" "I feel guilty". "I should try harder". "I hate how caring sucks the life out of me some days, but more or dad needs me....except the harder I try the worse the disease is getting. "
"I do or did everything I can, but it still is not enough."
Some caregivers will identify with these feelings, it is not unlike a lot of the feelings a physician deals with - completely taboo to talk about of course.

So just about anything I talk about on this blog is connected in some way to my mother and her AD. It affected my whole life forever, personally and professionally.

1 comment:

karen said...

You are right on all aspects. I feel all those things everyday all the time. Write away . Write everything you feel,want to say or need to say or what needs to be said. I like it. Good job.

Talking about the book with the Lake Superior wind....... a calm day